Comfy at Horror Conventions

I've pondered the odd fact that I feel like I fit in at horror conventions, despite the fact that I have an anxiety disorder. Why in the world would someone with an anxiety disorder watch horror movies?

(Note: I can't handle some of the recent supernatural horror with very realistic special effects, but most of the others horror movies are fine for me.)

I may have finally stumbled across a key to why I'm generally ok with the horror genre.

Thing is, my anxiety is all in my head and it's something that isn't actually a danger to me. The kind of thing that happens in horror stories on the other hand, there is actual danger in them. Visiting your home town that you haven't seen since childhood, only to realize that a vampire has also moved in recently? And then finding that the new love of your life has been turned? Not only does that involve actual danger, but it's also a situation that I'm highly unlikely to ever find myself in.

Maybe I like the reminder of that fact that I'm unlikely to find myself in such situations.

horror silhouette: a knife held in front of a bloody moon

CthulhuCon and Zombie Lovecraft

Earrings

The annual horror convention known as CthulhuCon was this previous weekend, and it was a wonderful time. Or I guess I should say that half of it was last weekend, since the film festival part of it won't happen for another few months. But that doesn't change that it was a great time.

There was an art competition, during which I discovered that it can be quite fascinating to watch artists at their work. That actually surprised me. I'm not familiar with all of the artists in the photo below, but on the far right is Liv Rainy-Smith, who I wrote about a couple years ago when I first discovered her wood cuttings. I am still in love with her stuff. I have one of her pieces of a sea serpent (I always think it looks like a dragon) next to my bed.

Artists hard at work.

Speaking of art, I found one particular painting I so wanted to buy. It shows a tentacle reaching up out of the ocean grasping the TARDIS, and the 11th Doctor is sitting on top of that blue box fishing. I love it so much because I could definitely see that scene happening if there was an episode of the Doctor versus Cthulhu. It was a piece done by Lee Moyer, an artist new to me, and I was able to track it down online here.

There were also author readings, panels on subjects related to horror, cool merchandise...I may have gotten a little excitable about earrings, I admit. As evidence, please reference the first photograph showing four different pairs of mostly horror themed earrings which came home with me.

We also had a visit from the H.P. Lovecraft himself, back from the dead. (Ok, it's an actor named Leeman Kessler, but I'm going to pretend that he's a zombie Lovecraft.) In his new life he has had to rethink his means of living, and now specializes in offering advice and making YouTube videos. He's so entertaining that I set out to find a video of his to share.



It was definitely a great weekend. :)

Horror Conventions

Last weekend was Zompire, a local undead film festival that I was able to attend the first evening of. Unlike the other horror events I've attended the focus was on zombies, not Lovecraft. But there was one thing that was the same as what I experienced before, which was the sense that I belonged there. That surprised me at the first horror convention I attended, and by now I've stopped thinking about it.

Now that I am thinking about it (and this may be me over analyzing things), that may be that sense of belonging that has really kept my interest in horror. Though I can't say really put my finger on why I feel like I belong there.

Over the weekend I found myself thinking, again, that it may be strange for me to like horror since I have an anxiety disorder. Most of my life I made a point of avoiding the genre because I expected horror to be horrifying. After all, it's called horror, right? But somehow, most of it doesn't bother me. I've found that I just need to listen to my gut if it's saying that a particular movie may be too much for me to handle.

Actually, thinking back, maybe I should have figured out that I might like horror from my experiences with haunted houses I went to when I was younger. In particular I remember laughing at a scene that involved a woman giving birth to an alien baby, because it was so ridiculous that it was funny, and afterwards a friend told me that people aren't supposed to laugh at a haunted house. Um, sorry, I just found it laughable. So I laughed.

Although I didn't really have a plan when sitting down to write, I did want share a song I discovered at CthulhuCon in April. I realize this is rather after the fact, and I had intended to write about it in April, but was too busy with homework and migraines and stress. This, and other songs that the group performs, are a retelling of a Lovecraft story. Unfortunately I can't remember which one and I haven't yet made a point of reading it. Yes, I know, bad of me if I really like the music...in my defense I've been a bit distracted.



I was lucky enough to see this performed live, and it was amazing. I was also surprised since it's not at all the usual music I enjoy. So I can't say why I like it, but I just do.

...And I'm realizing that I didn't have any particular place I was going with this post, and I hadn't even planned most of what I said above. I had also meant to avoid the subject of anxiety because I'm tired of writing about it on the blog, but since it's just part of my life I may as well acknowledge it.

And now I'm thinking,  maybe I should just sit down and start writing and see where it goes more often, rather than thinking that I need to have a plan? If I do that, I may blog more, which is what I want. Hmm...

So, this is my maybe sort of random post that isn't exactly the sort of thing I'd been wanting to write, but it feels so good to write that I'll go ahead and hit the "publish" button.