Wednesday, March 5, 2014

A Cure For Homesickness

I've been homesick. For my old apartment. And also for school.

Getting my own place is something I've been working on. I had a temp job that seemed promising, since it lasted for half a year, but there was the slight problem of it not going permanent. And although I have been working on my unemployment problem since then, nothing promising has come along. I feel like I'm spinning my wheels and getting nowhere fast. I mean, I moved back in with my parents "for only a few months, just until I get another job" well over a year ago. Over a year ago. And I'm still here. And most of my stuff is still in a storage facility that my mom is kindly paying for. Including most of my books, which as an English major I find sort of depressing.

But school...I can do something about that bit of homesickness, without having to wait for someone to take a liking to my resume.

I had a plan when I took a break from school, and it's one that I'd pretty much forgotten about. I was going to wait until I could file as an independent on taxes so that, maybe, I could get more financial aid, and I thought that I might get enough to live on. In retrospect I'm actually not sure who told me that was possible, and I don't know if it even is possible for me. I realized this in the last couple days. But I guess there's one way to find out.

Last week, sort on on impulse, I filled out FASFA (federal student aid) forms. My reasoning being, hey, it can't hurt to check it out.

Then I realized that I'd have to also apply for financial aid with my school to find out anything.

And to do that I have to be a student. Which meant contacting my old adviser in the English department and saying along the lines of "Hey, I think I want to come back to school soon, probably by fall, maybe this spring? What do I need to do?" This led to us talking to admissions (I had to apply for re-admission) and me meeting with my adviser to talk about classes.

Early on in this process, I was just checking it out. Exploring a possibility. You know, seeing if I could get enough financial aid to let me have my own home again while completing school. But while e-mailing with my adviser and admissions, even before setting foot back on campus again, I realized something.

I've missed school. I've missed it a lot, and I got really freaking excited just thinking about going back. And if I just turned around and told them "Yeah, sorry, never mind," I might hate myself for backing out. Even if the financial aid doesn't turn out to be as much as I'd hoped.

So, will I be able to get my own apartment soon? I don't know. Will I be working on my English degree again? Definitely yes.

As for how I felt after meeting with my adviser to pick out classes for spring term, I can't remember the last time I did something for myself that made me this happy.

That said, I'm also nervous. And I know school will drive me crazy, oh...maybe two weeks in. But that's all part of the fun.

The fountain at school