Friday, March 13, 2015


I've been kind of torn on how to write about my birthday. I'd prefer to act like my life is great, but it really isn't. And I'm finally admitting to myself that I'm not improving with the anxiety and depression exactly as much as I'd been pretending that I was, even though I am learning healthier ways to think, as I've written about before.

So...mixed feelings. At the same time, birthday was great.

I was able to spend the day with Murray, and as my present he took me to a gun range where I got to shoot (well, with a gun that shoots a laser) in a simulator. My first shooting lesson was in the woods shooting at targets we'd brought, and as a second lesson this was pretty good. Apparently I'm a decent shot, too.

After that was delicious food, movies, and we may or may not have fallen asleep together on the futon in my parents' living room.

There was also pecan pie in place of cake, my family singing me happy birthday, and I got an awesome dragon wrapped around a sword from my parents. It's something to hang on the wall, though I haven't gotten around to putting it up. And although it didn't arrive in time for my birthday, Tall One ordered a Jayne's hat for me that I'm looking forward to wearing. I've been wanting one ever since I watched a particular episode in a certain TV show a few months back.

(If you don't know what a Jayne's hat is, watch Firefly.)

Then I finished up the day by staying up way too late with my Game of Thrones book that I can't believe I haven't read before now.

It's good that, even though I still don't know what to do about the anxiety/depression often, I can still have fun days.


Debra She Who Seeks said...

Happy Birthday, Sarita! You got some great gifts. Life is full of ups and downs. Things will improve, I know they will.

Sarita Rucker said...


Carrie Chaney said...

On your birthday: Happy belated birthday! I'm so glad you had a good one. :)

On depression: You are stronger than you know, and braver than you think. (Or something like that. I am the queen of mis-quoting.) FYI, my fb chat is always an option, should you ever need a reminder that you're not alone.


Sarita Rucker said...

I think the quote is pretty close to that. And thanks, I just might PM you. :)

I'm also watching the Game of Thrones TV show with my boyfriend, we're on season one and absolutely LOVING it. We were addicted just two episodes in, it's seriously good.