Thursday, May 23, 2013

Supporting your community

If you're part of a minority group that needs to present a united front, and which needs to show support for its members, is it a reasonable expectation that you should attend every get together?

And if you get ticked off at someone for not showing up to view your brief bisexual film at an LGBT event, should you take it up with them privately or wait months before suddenly making your grievance public?

As you may have guessed, these questions have been prompted by a drama that I have been watching unfold. I can't give you links to both sides of the story (at least not yet), so I'll spare you the details. But it basically goes back to my original question: is it reasonable to expect a person to attend every event possible within their community?

Let's face it, going to every screening/talk/party/whatever just isn't possible. Sometimes, there are multiple events going on at the same time, and you can only be in one place at once. (Unless you're Hermione Granger and have a time turner.) For myself, I have to wonder what these people would say if there were a Pagan event and an LGBT event that conflicted with each other...would choosing one over the other suggest to them that I value one community more than the other? And sometimes a person's schedule is just so full that they have to take time off to relax at home, or to have a quiet dinner with friends. name just a very few legit reasons for why someone might miss an event.

Whatever someone's reasons, I don't see why failing to show up to a screening should be termed "boycotting," or why it's worth turning it into a giant public fight on Facebook months after the fact. Unless someone is just trying to stir up controversy...interesting thought, that.

As for whether it's better to discuss such a grievance in private or scream about it publicly, I won't even touch that in this post.

I'm just glad that I'm jaded enough by now to not be disappointed at finding proof that the bisexual community isn't one big happy family. And if I find that I can share links to both sides of this argument, I'll share them in case anyone's interested in the details.


Debra She Who Seeks said...

Blecchh. Eternal infighting goes on within any minority community and the LGBTQ community is no different. I've been caught up in some knock-down, drag-out fights myself over the years (as an ally, never as a central disputant). Very tiresome and counter-productive. Not worth all the time and energy that gets put into it either.

Sarita Rucker said...

You've got counter-productive right. Unless one side is actually trying to stir up controversy or create drama, which is what I'm speculating about. Maybe I'm totally wrong there, but it's food for thought.

I'm not actually involved in this one. Just watching, asking one or two questions of the accuser (which have gone unanswered...funny, that) and making my sympathies known.