Friday, February 15, 2013

Change your orientation?

There is a question that I have seen pop up a couple times, and it is as follows: If you could take a pill to change your sexuality, would you?

The graphic in question. Their website is

When I first saw this question asked I was very surprised by some of the answers. It was asked again on a LGBT Facebook group (Wipe Out Homophobia) and I saw more of the same answers, some of which still sort of surprise me.

Most people say no. In fact, many say "hell no."

But...some people say yes. They say that being LGBT is more trouble than it's worth, and that it would be easier to be straight.

A few say that they would rather be bisexual, because it would open up more options for them.

A surprising number say that they would be happy to try this magic pill if the change were only temporary.

Some said that a change in their sexual orientation would not change who they really are, and seemed ok with the idea of changing it. Many others said that their sexy orientation has shaped who they have become, and that they would no longer be themselves if it changed.

More than one person said that for the sake of their significant other, they wouldn't want to change. Huh. I guess they overlooked that they could go bi/pansexual and still stay with whoever they're already with. Maybe I'm being cynical or depressed, but is this just another case of bisexuals being invisible? If you think I shouldn't be so grumpy over this, say so. I could maybe do with a reality check. And yes I'm doing this in tiny font because really it's beside the point of what this post is about, but I can't resist commenting on it.

There were a few answers that I found particularly interesting, for varying reasons.

"yes. then i'd totally be a pansexual drag queen! <3" (I found this one just plain amusing.)

"no bloody way, actually yes I'd take one to make me 100% gay instead of Bi"

"Yes I want kids"

"Yes. I'm tired of being asexual"

Then there were the people who complained that this was a really stupid question to ask. To those people, I would like to recommend reading the various answers. Considering the many different responses that I read, I think that this was actually a very good question to ask. If nothing else, discussing this topic gives us a better understanding of our community.

My own personal response to the question is no. I would not change the fact that I am bisexual. I spent too much time coming to terms with my sexual orientation to make those years meaningless.

...that being said, I am well aware that I may eventually realize that I am in fact pansexual. It's not impossible. But that wouldn't be me changing what I am with a magic pill. It would be me coming to a better understanding of myself, just like when I accepted/took the "bisexual" label.

What about you? Would you change your sexual orientation if someone made a magic pill? Why or why not?


Debra She Who Seeks said...

I thank the Goddess every day that I'm a lesbian. So no, I wouldn't take a pill to change, LOL! I love everything about women and they are all I need.

Re: your invisible bisexual question -- I think that answer just doesn't occur to people because they assume that bisexuality means being more or less equally sexually active with both men and women. Your scenario wouldn't occur to most people who aren't bi already, I think.

Sarita Rucker said...

Women certainly are awesome, I won't argue about that. :)

I probably would have toned down my complaint to a mere observation of facts if there had been more than an hour between when I wrote the post and when it went up. And if someone is happy with their partner then there wouldn't be any point in changing unless they want more options sometime down the road. And even there, some say that we really don't have more options after all.