Saturday, July 28, 2012

Confused? No...

I haven't come across much of any nastiness about being bisexual. That could be because of the company I keep, or it could be because I've only been "out" for six months. And in that time I haven't told many people, simply because it hasn't come up.

But when I'm reading about bi-ness (or whatever you want to call it) I keep seeing that some people think we're confused. I especially keep seeing that on the Facebook group Bisexuality Is Real: teens (or adults) who are told that they're just confused, and that they need to choose one gender or the other.

Um, what?

Well guess what? I was confused. For years. Then I finally accepted that I'm bi, and I'm not so confused anymore. Now that I've accepted that I don't have to choose between men and women I'm not confused anymore when I can't keep my eyes off a hot woman. Yeah, for years I insisted that I was straight, I guess because I have a definite preference for men, and because of that I would get very uncomfortable when I found myself attracted to a woman.

So, far from being confused, figuring out that I'm bi has actually cleared up some confusion.



Debra She Who Seeks said...

Yeah, people who don't know what they're talking about will say bi's are "confused." It's the equivalent to them telling gays and lesbians that "it's just a phase." Glad you haven't caught much flak about it!

Toriz said...

Actually, I think in some cases it is confused teens exploring their sexuality, or confused adults trying to find out what they like after having been forced to conform during childhood and their teens. In your case, and in many other cases, that's not how it is. But sometimes it really is just confusion and/or a person exploring their sexuality.

Sarita Rucker said...

Debra -- Well, it *might* be a phase. But it's a phase that's lasted a lifetime for many. ;)

Tori -- Yes, in some cases people are confused while trying to figure it out. What I'm objecting to is the assumption that all bisexuals are confused.

Toriz said...

That's a fair objection.